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Sunday, February 17, 2008

To talk or not to talk...

Okay, so most of you that know me, know that I love to talk! One on one, or in small groups, it doesn't matter. I love adult conversation, (kid conversation is fun too, but I get that all the time). Sometimes after leaving girls nights, or play dates though, I will think oh man.... I think I said too much. Or, those people probably think I am crazy. The reason why I feel this way is because when I get uncomfortable, or if it gets too quiet (I really do like quiet, but in big groups, new groups etc. silence gets me all squirmy) I start to joke, or tell things about myself..... I don't know how it happens, they just come out. I will tell funny things that happened that day, embarrassing things, or just plain old weird things... I told my little sister once, that she probably takes me places just for the pure entertainment of what I will say. She is so quiet, (not a bad thing by the way, wish I could be) so I end up being the one talking to everyone. (I really think somewhere in the back of her mind she thinks how in the world are you my sister :)). There is a but to this though, a big but.... I cannot speak in public, I shake, I stutter, I am constantly reminding myself bend your knees, bend your knees.... The last thing I want to do is pass out in front of everyone ;) It wouldn't be a new thing as most of you know.... And I get so nervous that I start to talk at the speed of light, which turns my ten minute talk into a three minute blur.... When we first moved into this ward, and the bishopric asked us to speak, three days before we were supposed to, the doctor told me I had to be on bedrest (I would say I lucked out, but I am pretty sure I would rather have taken my turn at the pulpit, than spent the 22 weeks in bed). Well I guess the bishopric heard about us getting an offer on our house, because they asked us to speak in Sacrament meeting next week. I know, I know we could have said no, but there is something in me that can never say no... Not to anything, well probably some things (like giving blood, even just typing that right now makes me all qweezy... yuck!) Wow see my train of thought is all over the place just thinking about speaking... Well wish me luck and hopefully I won't shake the pulpit off of the stand ;)

5 comments:

kandice-mom-of-3 said...

I am just the same. I can go up there and do the job at the pulpit, but my heart usually beats louder than my own voice. You will do great though. Get a blessing and say lots of prayers and it will all be over before you know it.

Paul & Megan Hawkes said...

Good Luck on the talk. I hate speaking in Church. Make Courtney go last so he can use up any left over time!
Love,
Megan

Janice said...

I get super nervous too, today I had to teach in RS and I was really nervous. What is your topic on? I am so going to be there, what time? I will take care of the boys for you.

Have a good week.

Emily said...

Good luck on your talks! We will come sit on the front row with big banners and signs and cheer! hee hee! You will do great!

Who Knows??? said...

the key ta speekin is jist ta be as elquint as possumble. I kin give ya some lessins if'n ya need. I once was a spokes person fur the lokal moonshine foundation and people was so excited ta hear me speek that thay was always walkin crooked and fallin over like they was drinkin er somethin.